1. You find it hard to watch TV when your partner is crying.
2. You’re pretty sure you’d care if your partner died.
3. You find that you often think about your partner when he or she’s not around.
4. You find that you care deeply about your partner even when he or she’s no longer useful to you.
5. You find that you care deeply about your partner even when he or she’s no longer fun.
6. You find that you often seem to care about your partner’s needs just as much as your own.
7. You find that you need your partner. And your partner seems to need you too.
8. It upsets you to see your partner upset.
9. You feel an overwhelming desire to take care of your partner when he or she’s sick.
10. You find yourself ready and willing to make sacrifices for your partner.
If you experience any of these symptoms for more than a week, seek professional help immediately!
—John Faithful Hamer, The Myth of the Fuckbuddy (2017)